So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize