Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize