So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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