your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
