evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
My dick has a subreddit
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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