I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
you never un-have a 4some
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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