how can u be prego again
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Is it because I queefed?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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