i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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