I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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