I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
