The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
