i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
