At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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