seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
