We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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