OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
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2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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