the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
