The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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