Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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