Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
