That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
