Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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