cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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