Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
