today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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