i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
