I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
