And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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