He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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