doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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