so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
