Can Purell be used as lube?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
