My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
