cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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