and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
