saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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