Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
What a dumb baby whore.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
