my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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