This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
