I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
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He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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