omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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