I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
