I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
