She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Everyone says I win the strip club
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
