yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
