he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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