Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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