I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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