It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
