I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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