im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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